WHITT'S END: 9.30.13

      Whether you're at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt's End

   *Rangers win! Cowboys lose!! Let's keep it simple today.

   *Chargers 30, Cowboys 21: My Top 10 Whitty Comments are over at NBC 5's Blue Star Blog.

   *I admit, I didn't think the Rangers would be playing baseball tonight. Thought they were done after Sept. 22's kick-to-the-crotch loss in Kansas City via Grand Slam in extra innings. Give 'em credit. I know they played the putrid Astros and Angels, but they won seven consecutive elimination games to end the season. Impressive.

   *So did the Rangers make the playoffs? They're kind of in Purgatory, the gray space between success and failure. Tonight at 7 on TBS they'll play Game 163, and all the statistics will count toward the regular season. But Nelson Cruz will be back and it's a do-or-die game, so it must be the post-season. Right?

   *When Bruce Carter and Morris Claiborne get benched, it's hard to blame the Cowboys' coaching staff. Neither of those highly-touted guys are making plays, and Monte Kiffin is attempting to fix what is surprisingly broken.

   *David Price vs. Martin Perez. Tampa's veteran ace vs. Texas' 22-year-old rookie that has made only 25 career starts, 0 in the post-season. Seems like a mismatch, but Price is 1-7 all-time against the Rangers with a 5.57 ERA and 1-2 with a 10.26 ERA in four starts in Arlington. Also in the Rangers' favor, home teams are 5-1 in Tiebreaker Play-In Games since '95.

   *Hot.

   *Not.

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   *20 games into his NFL career and I'm trying to remember Claiborne's signature play. He has one interception (last year against Cam Newton) and one touchdown (a scoop-'n-score fumble return against the Eagles.) Yikes.

   *You know who I can't stand? The lazy, shallow Cowboys' "fan" who watches the loss to the Chargers and issues the same, tired synopsis. "They just weren't mentally prepared." Wait, what the what?! How was their mental preparation when they were up 21-10 just before halftime? "They just have a losing culture." This is tough for Cowboys fans, but sometimes you just have to admit that your players got their butts kicked by their players. Remember the expectations for this team. When you predict them to go 9-7, you shouldn't freak out at 2-2. "Same ol' Cowboys." They're 23-21 under Jason Garrett and .500 going all the way back to 1996. When they win why isn't also "same ol' Cowboys"?

   *If Yu Darvish is truly an ace, he's got to last more than 85 pitches in a Game 7 situation.

   *ESPN's Ray Lewis picked the winner, but I'm pretty sure he didn't do his homework. Offered Lewis of Cowboys-Chargers on the network's pre-game show: "The Chargers are very excited about their football team. I think at home they win today." I get tons better analysis in the comments section, and you guys are considerably less paid.

   *Unless Adrian Beltre goes bonkers tonight the Rangers will finish without a 100-RBI guy for only the third time in the last 20 years. Beltre has 92 RBI. In '07 Michael Young led the team with 94 and in '09 it was Marlon Byrd with 89.

 

  *Activating and playing Cruz isn't even a debate. Stop it. He's eligible to play. So he should play. Not sure what message you think the Rangers would send by not playing their biggest bat in the season's biggest game.

   *Yes, the Cowboys' defense was atrocious Sunday. But you know what hurt them as much as anything else? Three third-down drops by receivers that ended offensive drives. Dwayne Harris, Dez Bryant and Jason Witten all should've caught key passes, but didn't. Said Dez of his third-quarter drop on the sideline: "Just trying to see where I was at on the field. I kind of lost my eye on the ball, trying to keep my feet in bounds."

   *Rangers' TV play-by-play voice Steve Busby yesterday described a pitch as a "comeback fastball." I know baseball can get tedious, but sometimes announcers just make up crap to test if we're listening.

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   *Best moment of the weekend was Josh Hamilton meekly flying out in the last at-bat of his failed, forgettable season, getting roundly booed by Rangers fans and then sarcastically tipping his cap. Hamilton reminds me of someone else. Once a more popular, more rotund, more successful person, he's also deteriorated into a freakishly skinny dude with drastically dipping performance, diminished popularity and a scraggly beard. He's ... Breaking Bad's Walter White. Right? Wait, who did you think I was talking about?

   *David Arkin has yet to play a single snap for the Cowboys. The offensive lineman was selected in the 4th Round of the 2011 NFL Draft, 44 picks ahead of Seahawks' cornerback Richard Sherman. I apologize for ruining your breakfast.

   *Under Ron Washington the Rangers are 1-3 in elimination games. They won Game 5 over the Rays in 2010, but have since lost Game 5 of the '10 World Series, Game 7 of the '11 World Series and the Wild-Card Game to the Orioles in '12.

   *Love Fox Sports Southwest's suuuuuuuper-sloooooooow-motionnnnnnnn camera for Rangers replays, but not sure why it's called "Phantom Cam." Phantom refers to a ghost or an illusion of something that's almost impossible to see. This camera makes things easier to see. Really should be called the Un-Phantom Cam.

   *The Rangers' Alex Rios has played 1,454 games without reaching the playoffs, third-most among active players behind only Adam Dunn and Vernon Wells. The all-time record? Ernie Banks and his 2,528 over 19 seasons with the Cubs. If the Rangers don't officially make the playoffs, won't be Rios' fault. In 46 games in Texas he's hit .280 with six homers and 25 RBI.

   *Hope you enjoyed that pink-free Cowboys game. Because of breast cancer awareness month, it'll be the last one until Nov. 3. I hate cancer and I love charity, it just gets old after oh, I dunno, two weeks.

   *Today? I know all the buzz is Cowboys' loss and Rangers' win, but I'll be down at American Airlines Center this afternoon for Mavs' Media Day. Tonight at 7 I'll figure out where TBS is on DirecTV and watch Rangers-Rays. Don't be a stranger.

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WHITT'S END: 9.23.13

      Whether you're at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt's End

   *Cowboys 31, Rams 7: My Top 10 Whitty Observations over at NBC 5's Blue Star Blog, including a foggy memory of the last time the Cowboys played such a dominant first half of football. Hint: We were Christmas shopping. And a lot younger.

   *EDIT: The more I hear the more this seems like Galloway is pulling the strings on his own departure. To which I say, good for him. I've written a couple times that it'd make sense for Cumulus to just buy out the contract of Randy Galloway and, sure enough, one way or another, the legendary media icon's days are numbered. It's actually Galloway's decision since his non-transferable contract stipulates him only working for ESPN, but regardless, his last day on the radio will be the day The Ticket officially takes over 103.3 FM ESPN. That could be as soon as Friday or as far out as a month from now, as the FCC has initially rejected The Ticket's selling of its 104.1 FM signal. Galloway's contract runs through Dec. 31, but he has zero intention of working for the Cumulus folks he's battled against for three decades. Though the station is upticking in the ratings, the expected cuts at ESPN are now beginning. Out as of last week - but also not official until the switch is approved - are program director Tom Lee, general manager Pete Dits and on-air talent like Kelly Webster and Landry Locker. Filling Galloway's big boots won't be easy, as he's been a print fixture in the Metroplex since 1966. I'm told names being kicked around to take his chair include The Ticket's Norm Hitzges, Channel 8's Dale Hansen and Channel 11's Steve Dennis. Also told that Galloway sidekick Matt Mosley's job is safe, awaiting a new partner. Not that Dennis - or anyone else - can come in and dent The Hardline's dynasty, but he's opinionated, educated and not afraid to ask a tough question nor shy away from offering a unique view. I worked alongside Galloway at the Star-Telegram, competed against him at 105.3 The Fan and played with him at various horse tracks around the country. Personally, I'll miss him.

   *Last year it was Josh Hamilton's bat. This Fall it's Nelson Cruz's. For very different reasons, obviously, they both vanished at the wrong time. And the punchless Rangers are again authoring an epic collapse. On Aug. 23 the Rangers led the A's by 3.5 games. On Sept. 22 the A's clinched the AL West. How does a 12-game swing happen? The Rangers haven't won back-to-back games since Aug. 28, that's how.

   *Between Breaking Bad and Dexter and Bears-Steelers and my late-night appearance on NBC 5's Big Game Sunday, managed to watch a little of The Emmys. Gotta admit, very entertaining. Neil Patrick Harris was a lively host. The Newsroom's Will MacAvoy beat out Walter White. And two women caught my eye: That one with the cavernous cleavage that I can never understand and who's on that show that I never watch. And the one from Homeland who always makes those painful faces and is flatter than Odessa.

   *Monday tastes a little better with this sugar on top: For the first time ever, the Giants and Redskins are both 0-3. Bon appetit.

   *Hot.

   *Not.

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   *As expected, 'twas a lousy college football weekend. Top 10 teams went 8-0 by an average score of 50-12. Miami (-59.5), Ohio State (-51.5) and Louisville (-41) all covered gaudy spreads by scores 77-7, 76-0 and 72-0. It was so ridiculous in Miami that the Hurricanes and Savannah State agreed to a mercy-rule, 12-minute fourth quarter. Scheduling cupcakes is such a waste of time. Teams don't need scrimmages at this point in the season. Fans get zero drama. And after last weekend's fantastic A&M-Alabama game, college football goes anonymous for a week. Embarrassing that Ohio State fans actually made shirts to taunt Florida A&M.

   *North Texas got $975,000 for traveling to Georgia and was tied 21-21 in the third quarter before losing 42-21. I'd say that trip was worth it.

   *Sunday was just the latest kick-to-the-crotch loss for the Rangers. Thursday in Tampa they hit three homers in an inning. But if not the long ball this team just can't score. Over the weekend in KC they mustered only four runs in three games. And yesterday it ended painfully with Justin Maxwell's walk-off Grand Slam. First Slam to end a scoreless game in extra innings since 1967. The Rangers have a horrible habit of making history.

   *Sleeping with the windows open is one of life's little pleasures. Happens around here, what, maybe 30 nights a year?

   *You know how you know you have a great quarterback? When he throws more interceptions than touchdowns and you realize it hasn't happened in 36 games. Aaron Rodgers and the Packers had another statistical oddity in Cincy yesterday: They scored 30 consecutive points. And lost.

   *Went to DFWRescueMe's Wags 'n Waves event at NRH20 Saturday afternoon. As Sybil was emceeing the dog skills contest, a canine strolled through and left a gigantic dump right in the middle of the proceedings. Not sure if he entering his "skill" or merely offering a biting commentary on the competition.

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   *Not everyone was bored by college football. Decent boxer and ballsy gambler Floyd Mayweather Jr. wagered $200,000 that A&M would lead SMU by at least 18 points at halftime. Score: A&M 32, Mustangs 6. Another TKO for the champ.

   *Good news for the Rangers. Yeah, they trail the Indians and Rays by 1.5 games for the second Wild Card. But the Astros are in town. Rangers have beaten them eight in a row and are 14-2 vs. Houston this season. Three must-wins over the worst team in baseball and the final four games vs. Anaheim will be meaningful and delicious. For what it's worth, Rays finish with one against Orioles tonight, then six at Yankees and Blue Jays. Indians finish with two against White Sox and four at the Twins.

   *When construction is finished, why don't we call them "builts"?

   *I was prepared to say that Mariano Rivera's farewell tour hadn't gotten completely out of control, but having Metallica play your retirement party is badass. Exit, Sandman.

   *Went to Sherlock's in Addison Friday night and - swear - had the door guy check my ID. I turn 50 in July. I offer that not as some flimsy attempt to claim I'm aging gracefully, but more as a stinging indictment of the guy's pathetic evaluation skills.

   *Today? A little bike ride with Sybil in the afternoon sunshine, followed by a screening of the JFK movie Parkland tonight at the Angelika Film Center in Mockingbird Station. Don't be a stranger.

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1-Nil Belongs on Soccer Pitch, Not Inside Rangers Ballpark in Arlington

   Flo from Progressive's sex appeal.
   Sympathy for the Texas Longhorns.
   The Cowboys' playoff success this millennium.
   Scoring in tonight's U.S.-Mexico soccer match.
   The girl to the right's bikini.
   Oklahoma State's credibility.
   Yeah, the Rangers' offensive support for Yu Darvish is that small. They're so inept with their ace on the mound these days you'd think RISP was a four-letter obscenity.
   Darvish bounced back from one of his worst starts as a Ranger, holding the Pittsburgh Pirates to one run Monday night before leaving with cramps in his leg after six innings and 81 pitches. But yet again, one run was one too many as the offense managed only three singles in a painful 1-0 loss.
   As the Rangers now face their largest division deficit (two games) since Aug. 5 and the Oakland A's' Magic Number dwindles to 20, this has deteriorated from a statistical oddity into an alarming trend. The Rangers have lost the last five starts by Darvish. In those games they've produced run totals of 3, 2, 2, 4 and 0.
   Darvish's  last win? Aug. 12 against the Houston Astros. Score: 2-1.

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   "This is what it is," said Darvish, who's receiving a minuscule 2.9 runs of support in his last 19 starts. "It's baseball. Sometimes, the offense can't score a run. Some days, you might score 20 runs. Some days, you might throw a no-hitter and not win. The hitters did their best and I did my best."

   Another September, another offensive swoon?

   We all know how Josh Hamilton and the bats vanished down the stretch a year ago. And so far, so ugly in 2013. Totally neutered by Pirates' rookie Gerrit Cole, the Rangers - I think it's safe to say they now miss Nelson Cruz - have scored five runs or less in nine consecutive games. Their only scoring chance last night came after two walks and three stolen bases in the 6th, but Adrian Beltre hit a harmless chopper to shortstop.

   Darvish is the first Rangers' starter to lose three 1-0 games in a season. It happened May 21 against A's, July 27 at Cleveland and last night. If it happens again in his next start - Saturday against Oakland - he'll pull his hair out and we'll likely count Texas out.

   Darvish deserved better. Unlike in Oakland when he was a nibbling, angry, pouting mess, he was aggressive and animated on the mound. But he also must come to grips with this realization:

   There have been 14 1-0 games at Rangers Ballpark in 20 seasons, two of them with him pitching this summer.

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WHITT'S END: 8.9.13

      Whether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End

   *Source told me yesterday that while the Mavericks had serious discussions with 105.3 The Fan to become partners, they ultimately are staying put at 103.3 FM. Whether it's ESPN or Tickespn or whatever, for the next two years you can hear Mavs' hoops there. For Chuck Cooperstein fans like myself, that's good news.

   *Putting in a claim to acquire the White Sox' Alex Rios won't save the Rangers' suddenly surging season. He's a .277 hitter with 12 homers. Without Nelson Cruz, the path to the postseason is paved with pitching and defense. Or, by playing the Angels every night. I almost felt sorry for Anaheim as Texas swept it for the second time in 10 days, but then I saw Josh Hamilton's arrogant flailing at first pitches and had to giggle. Considering his second  half in 2012, he's not in a slump. More like a year-long slide below mediocrity.

   *I have a guarantee about tonight's Cowboys-Raiders' preseason game: Jason Witten will have a better night than he did a year ago in Oakland. Remember?

   *I wrote this week that Ticket P1s were "narrow-minded" and I've been asked to expound on that theory. Here goes: Ticket fans are so extremely loyal that they've become blind. Listeners love BaD Radio, but if Bob and Dan would've left for The Fan back in June Ticket fans wouldn't have followed their show. In fact, they would've labeled the hosts "traitors". The quality of show has been replaced - even usurped - by the location on the dial. You can be loyal to McDonald's while recognizing that Wendy's has a delicious Spicy Chicken Sandwich. But some P1s have decided that anything and everyone sold outside 1310 AM is dog shit. Kudos to The Ticket for nurturing such brand loyalty over almost 20 years. But to me, that's narrow-minded.

   *A&M fans are the most sensitive, irrational bunch on the planet. C'mon Aggies, you really, honestly, believe that Johnny Goofball signed hundreds of autographs on memorabilia - assembly-line style - for zero compensation. Just because he's a good guy? Just to help out a bunch of brokers he'd never met before? Riiiiight. When this thing finally plays out we'll be reminded of the perils of hiring 20-year-old kids named "Uncle Nate" to be in charge of anything important. All that said, hopefully this is the impetus to prompt the NCAA to be Dead 'n Gone. Yesterday NCAA Prez Mark Emmert admitted a mistake and yanked all individual jerseys for sale off ShopNCAASports.com. Go away, NCAA. At this point you're part of the problem, not the solution.

   *Hot.

   *Bonus Hot. (Because apparently the link didn't work on some platforms last week.)

   *Not.

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   *If you missed Sybil this morning co-hosting D: The Broadcast, she wore a blue dress. And a huge smile.

   *Public memorial for Kidd Kraddick will be Thursday at 5:30 in Victory Park's AT&T Plaza, featuring a concert by Ben Folds. Still holding my breath at the return of the toxicology reports. Still hope it's not true, but after what I wrote last week about his late-night partying, I received a new slew of folks who heard - even witnessed - the same thing.

    *So Hunter Mahan leaves the Canadian Open golf tournament he's leading to attend the birth of his child and everyone hails him as some kind of hero. Good for him. He's a solo act (other than his caddie). Not letting any teammates down like, say, Colby Lewis did once upon a time.

   *Lotsa folks asking me my take on the Ticket takeover of ESPN. All I got is right here.

   *If I'm Cumulus and I now control 103.3 FM, I immediately buy out the contract of Randy Galloway. As I wrote Thursday morning and as he later confirmed, he'll retire from radio when his deal expires Dec. 31. Why allow him to be a lame-duck host armed with both eff-you attitude and eff-you money? Remember, he's despised The Ticket for years and those boys have used him as a "Grandpa Urine" punch line. That's a dangerous combo. By the way, I love Galloway. Worked with him at the Star-Telegram for years and I'll always remember him taking me and Mike Fisher on a joy ride complete with multiple, illegal, obscenity-laced U-turns in his big Cadillac right in the heart of Times Square. Even then he had an eff-you persona. And by the way, if I'm The Fan, soon as Galloway is bought out by Cumulus I make him a rethink-retirement offer.

   *You know what's dumb? When a snarky web site tries to call Cowboys' fans "dumb" but in the process of its detailed criticism misspells the name of team legend Jay "Novachek." Who looks dumb now?

   *Vintage A-Fraud from his presser this week: "I'm fighting for my life. I have to defend myself. If I don't defend myself no one else will." Okay, cool. Then delight us with the details of how you're not guilty. Go on, defend yourself. Said A-Rod, "This isn't the time or place to do that." What. The. What?!

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   *Creepy story out of South Dallas where Erbie "E Luv" Bowser - a former ManiAAC dancer - killed four and injured four more. Most troubling about the story is the fact that he shot kids aged 11, 13 and 14. Can't imagine ever being that mad - or deranged. Just goes to show you, though, ManiAACs are people, too.

   *When I was in 7th grade American schools actually tried to switch to the Metric system. I remember the "Think Metric!" posters on our classroom walls. It failed. Miserably. So why, 30 years later, do we still sell our American soft drinks in 2-liter bottles? Why aren't they simply 67-ounce bottles?

    *It's a "No Sales Tax Weekend"! To me, that's code for "Another Weekend to Avoid Malls Weekend"! Which, of course, is code for "Just Like Every Other Weekend"!

   *And your latest non-Maverick: Greg Oden. The big man with the bad knees chose the Heat over Dallas. Man I'm tired of writing that storyline.

   *Not a good preseason for those who chose to follow Rob Ryan from the Cowboys to the Saints. Both Victor Butler and Kenyon Coleman have suffered season-ending injuries.

   *Yeah, well at least I didn't build a skyscraper without an elevator.

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   *I've got two new suggestions for you this week: A book by Brian Cuban and a band called the Texas Cotton Kings. The story of Mark Cuban's brother's journey with eating disorders, etc. is compelling stuff. And the Kings will make you feel like you're in down-home Forney, which ain't a bad place to be.

    *LeBron James actually showed up for jury duty this week in Ohio. Gotta give him credit for that. He lives in Bath Township. Can't decide if that sounds exclusive or Rednecky or Amishy.

   *You know it's August in Dallas when you take out the trash at 6 a.m. and return to the house in a shirt drenched in sweat. God Bless Texas.

  *If you want the juice on the real-estate doings of (current and) former Cowboys' quarterbacks like Tony Romo and Troy Aikman, you should be be reading Candy Evans. She knows her scoop.

   *On the list of the toughest things I've done: 1. Climbing a 14,000-foot mountain; 2. Running a marathon; 3. Quitting the Star-Telegram; 4. Skydiving; 5. Bungee jumping; 6. White-water rafting; ... Oh, who am I kidding, dealing with Greggo daily for three years trumps 'em all. Combined.

   *It takes quite the man to prompt current and former employees of ESPN, The Ticket and The Fan to put down their swords long enough to amicably attend a birthday in his honor. And, yes, Bruce Gilbert is that man. The former program director at The Ticket and The Fan, who had a stint in the ESPN family, turns 50 Saturday and representatives from multiple combating radio army outlets will combine to roast him. I'm honored to be invited. Cheers.

   *This weekend? Tonight let's ogle some Cowboys-Raiders. Tomorrow it's a golf tournament in Rockwall with dear ol' Dad, followed by the aforementioned birthday roast. And Sunday we'll finish up the golf tournament in the morning, then play some sand volleyball in Frisco in the afternoon. Don't be a stranger.

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Despite His "Error in Judgment", Will We Forgive and Forget When It Comes to Nelson "Mohamad" Cruz?

   I like Nelson Cruz. As a player, obviously. But also as a clubhouse character.
   In March 2012 I was in the Rangers' clubhouse in Surprise, Arizona on the morning of Yu Darvish's first MLB Spring Training outing in nearby Peoria.
   "Can't wait. Very exciting," Cruz said with a twinkle in his eye, "It's gonna be like ... China Town!"
   Don't worry about the fact that Cruz screwed up his geography - Darvish, of course, is half-Iranian, half-Japanese - he's at times just a fun-lovin' kid merely playing a game.
   He's also, no way around it, the author of two of the biggest mistakes in Rangers' franchise history.
   In November 2011 he misplayed David Freese's fly ball to right field, costing Texas the World Series. And in August of 2013 he received a 50-game suspension from Major League Baseball for knowingly taking steroids.
   He's a cheater.
   A liar.
   And - being that Cruz is the team's best power hitter and his actions have ended his regular season - he's severely jeopardizing the Rangers' 2013 playoff push.
   But in baseball's Steroid Era that is now officially harder to kill than Freddy Krueger, are we eagerly willing to shrug our shoulders, forgive, forget and cheer his next at-bat in a Rangers' uniform - which would come in an October playoff game?
   Despite the ugly facts, I think know we are.

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   After beating the Angels last night to climb within two games of the A's in the AL West, Cruz's abandoned teammates talked of the slugger as a "great teammate." Said outfielder Craig Gentry, one of the many who will attempt to take up the slack left by Cruz' departure, "We know where his heart is."
   Do we?
   According to the original story detailing the business dealings of the south Florida anti-aging clinic Biogenesis - broken by the Miami New Times in January - Cruz was a customer that went by "Mohamad" and bought $4,000 worth of "product" from center director Anthony Bosch.
   And, after the story went viral, Cruz - through his law firm - called the story bullshit.

   "We are aware of certain allegations and inferences," read a statement released by Farrell & Reisinger in Febuary. "To the extent these allegations and inferences refer to Nelson, they are denied."

   No, actually they've now all been confirmed. And, when caught red-handed and now punished along with a dozen other players including Alex Rodriguez, now Cruz is, um, being inconsistent yet again. Unless I'm reading his Monday statement wrong, he's using an illness as an excuse while claiming he's not using the illness as an excuse.
   Right?

I have been notified by the Commissioner of Major League Baseball that I have been suspended for 50 games for violation of the Joint Drug Agreement. I have decided to accept this suspension and not exercise my rights under the Basic Agreement to appeal. From November, 2011 to January, 2012, I was seriously ill with a gastrointestinal infection, helicobacter pylori, which went undiagnosed for over a month. By the time I was properly diagnosed and treated, I had lost 40 pounds. Just weeks before I was to report to spring training in 2012, I was unsure whether I would be physically able to play. Faced with this situation, I made an error in judgment that I deeply regret, and I accept full responsibility for that error. I should have handled the situation differently, and my illness was no excuse. I am thankful for the unwavering support of my family, friends, and teammates during this difficult time. I look forward to regaining the trust and respect of the Rangers organization, my teammates, and the great Rangers' fans, and I am grateful for the opportunity to rejoin the team for the playoffs.

   If the Rangers somehow sneak into the post-season, they'd be eligible to bring back Cruz, their biggest bat. If they miss the playoffs, Cruz becomes a free agent who may have played his last game in a Rangers' uniform.
   Cruz is light years from the fraud A-Rod's handling of the whole ordeal. But still, the fun-lovin' kid with the shady geography has been replaced by a liar and a cheater and, perhaps, a former Ranger.
    And to think, this whole steroid shitstorm began 15 summers ago when a reporter spotted a bottle of Andro in Mark McGwire's locker. Baseball is still taking steps to recover, but evidenced by Cruz, et al, it ain't healed yet.

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Nelson Cruz Suspended for 50 Games/Regular Season: How Will He and the Rangers Survive?

   Okay Rangers fans, let's rub our hands together and get this thing going. It's about to get good.
   Since that closed-door meeting in Cleveland, Texas has won six of seven to resurrect baseball season. Thanks to Derek Holland's Sunday gem - he allowed only four singles over eight innings - the Rangers took two of three in Oakland and have sliced their deficit in the AL West from 6 to 2.5 games in a wonderful week.
   Ron Washington is now the winningest manager in franchise history (582), the bats are coming alive, tonight they face an Angels team they just swept in Arlington and ...
   Whoooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Nellie!
   It all comes to a screeching halt without their best power hitter. And today Nelson Cruz is accepting a suspension that will end his regular season.
   Now that Major League Baseball has decided its punishment for players connected to the Biogenesis lab in Miami - a story that broke way back during the Super Bowl - all the hype will surround Yankees' slugger Alex Rodriguez.
   But the most impactful player on the list wears a Rangers' uniform: Cruz.

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   While A-Rod could be suspended through the 2014 season (214 games), the loss of Cruz will severely derail Texas' playoff hopes. He is, after all, the Rangers' biggest and best power hitter, leading them in homers (27) and RBI (76) after yesterday's bomb against the A's. How vital is Cruz to the Rangers? Other than Adrian Beltre, they don't have a bat with more than 16 homers or 46 RBI.
   Cruz's suspension is 50 games. The Rangers, turns out, have 50 games remaining in the regular season.
   The Rangers' slugger has decided to accept the suspension, then rejoin the team for the playoffs if they qualify. He could have appealed and perhaps played another 20 games before a final ruling could've landed him ineligible for the post-season.
   Cruz is making the best of a bad situation: Accepting the consequences, then cross his fingers his teammates have enough pop to get into the playoffs.
   Without his bat, the Rangers - struggling for runs as is - have minimal options since they didn't acquire a power hitter at the trade deadline. Engel Beltre is left-handed. Manny Ramirez hasn't shown any mash at AAA. Doubtful, but maybe Jurickson Profar goes back to the outfield?
   Problem is, the Rangers' offense is homer-dependent. During their 6-1 resurgence they've hit 14 and in games they don't hit one they're only 9-26.
   To amplify this quandary, Cruz is a free agent after this season.
   Meaning - worst-case scenario - if Texas doesn't make the playoffs, he may have played his last game as a Ranger.
   And the 2013 baseball season may just have ended. Just when it was getting good.

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AL 3, NL ... ZZZZZZZZZZZ

   If the Rangers return to the World Series in 2013, Game 1 will be at Rangers Ballpark in Arlington. And, more importantly, so would a possible Game 7.
   As for other highlights from last night's All-Star Game ... nope. Sorry. Zilch.
   The American League totally handcuffed the National League to three measly hits in the, let's face it, boring 3-0 win in New York. Most excitement came in the bottom of the 7th, when Neil Diamond got the crowd - which included a couple Rangers'-clad bananas - to shake their groove thangs.

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   Other Rangers' impacts included the first All-Star save by closer Joe Nathan, but not before Nelson Cruz allowed his obligatory liner over his head and off the right-field wall with two outs in the 9th of a game with World Series implications. Nathan and his white shoes closed the door, but it was a rare bird - a Yankee that's impossible to hate - that stole the night.
   After Mariano Rivera's final appearance, no player will ever wear No. 42 in an All-Star Game again. Rivera pitched only one of the AL's nine scoreless innings, but was voted Most Valuable Player in lieu of a Lifetime Achievement Award.
   It came with a Corvette Stingray, which served as the night's second-most gorgeous sight. Unless, that is, you plan to attend Game 1 of the World Series in Arlington.

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WHITT'S END 7.5.13

      Whether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End

   *Dwight Howard, holed up in Aspen, Colorado, could decide his free-agent destination as early as today. Considering his fickle DNA and theatrical flair, however, he'll milk it into next week. Even Whataburger is a player in the drama, Tweeting this week: You can't pass up the chance to move to a Whataburger state. #dwight2houston Of course, um, Mavs fans in the Metroplex want Howard and their Whataburger as well. Someone in the restaurant chain's PR department has some 'splainin' to do.

   *Joey Chestnut won his seventh consecutive Fourth of July Hot Dog Eating contest yesterday, engulfing 69 in 10 minutes. His official stat line: 20,010 calories, 1,173 grams of fat, 48,990 milligrams of sodium and 759 grams of protein, all consumed in less time than it will take you to digest "Whitt's End". Competitive eating is Chestnut's only job, one that earns him $200,000 a year. God Bless America.

   *Fourth of July traditions in my family always included golf, watermelon and, of course, fireworks. I once held a Roman Candle backward, firing it into my stomach and leaving me with a blackened belly button for days. But my most ridiculous incident with festive explosives occurred when a junior-high buddy and I hatched a brilliant plan to flirt with the neighbor girls. The strategy: We'd light a 100-count strand of Black Cat firecrackers, open his bedroom window and toss them over the fence and into the girls' backyard. Surely that would get their attention and make us cool. Ready ... 3 ... 2... 1 ... Ohcrapweforgotthereisascreenonthewindow!!! The Black Cats simply bounced off the screen like a trampoline, landing in the middle of our bedroom and commencing four minutes of explosions that resonated through our house. Parents were none too happy and the ringing in my ears didn't stop until last week.

   *Huge comeback last night for the Rangers. Down 3-1 and in danger of getting swept by the horrible Seattle Mariners, they rallied for four runs in the 7th to escape. Couple strange sights. When Nelson Cruz made a catch on the warning track in right field in the 9th he did so just in front of a huge Gulf advertising banner on the wall. Gulf? There are none near my house in McKinney and only two in Dallas. Weird, thought their gas stations went the way of Braniff Airlines. And then to this Phiten fad that just won't die. In fact, now even manager Ron Washington and 74-year-old bench coach Jackie Moore are wearing the bulky, woven necklaces that are supposed to enhance your energy and stabilize your karma or somesuch. In a word, hooey. We're such suckers. Me included. I once bought a Pet Rock in the '80s. But now it's those Power Balance rubber bracelets with a magical hologram. Fake. And, sure enough, Phiten necklaces? Fake. One of the strongest products in the world is invisible: The Placebo Effect.

   *So I'm shopping on Wednesday and there is a Mom walking the aisles, being followed by two girls that appear to be 15-ish. Thing was, the teens were holding hands. I mean, like, lovingly, affectionately holding hands. Was it just innocent friendship or ... ? I followed them - creepy, right? - around one corner and when Mom turned around to tell them something they quickly and abruptly disengaged hands. Friendship? Or ...

   *Hot.

   *Not.

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   *Fourth of July fireworks provided by the guys who play on ... ice? Yep, the Dallas Stars pulled off a big trade yesterday, sending forward Loui Eriksson to the Boston Bruins for forward Tyler Seguin, center Rich Peverly and defenseman Ryan Button. While Eriksson was one of the few recognizable names remaining in an organization that has been completely gutted, you gotta give credit to the new braintrust of general manager Jim Nill/head coach Lindy Ruff. They are trying to fix what is broken.

   *This is very cool. Gym teacher wore the same outfit on his school's picture day for 40 straight years. Makes you go "Oh, I wanna do tha ... Damn, too late." Right?

   *During the Rangers' game on Fox Sports Southwest last night they displayed the results of a poll on what fans preferred on the Fourth. 52% responded "Watch the Rangers." About an hour later on the Colorado Rockies' telecast the same poll netted a leading answer (45%) of "Watch fireworks." Baseball town, anyone?

   *Props to Pops. My dad, who's a spry, young 73, now regularly shoots his age on the golf course. Been playing with him since I was about 7. Hundreds of rounds together. And I can count the times I've beaten him on one hand. Whipped me by seven strokes last week at Stonebriar Country Club in Frisco.

   *Buddy of mine went to Pappadeaux restaurant this week and reported something genius. When the waiter brought out crayons for the kids, they were flat-sided. As in, no more rolling off the table and onto the floor and "Mom, can you get my ... " whining. How'd that take us so long?

   *ESPN does a lot of things wrong, mainly its refusal to admit when it gets beat on a story. But props to the network for its segment featuring soldiers coming home from war to be reunited with their families. Despite Daughtry's "Coming Home" it was riveting, moving stuff.

   *Two things us men just can't seem to find: 1. Jimmy Hoffa's body; 2. A woman's G-Spot.

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   *For months I suffered from extremely tight calf muscles. When I tried to run I'd strain one, or the other, or both. I did what I thought was a lot of stretching, but nothing helped. From December to May I was uncomfortable to the point of often not playing tennis or going on jogs with Sybil out of fear of injury. Then something so simple cured me: Foam roller. That's right, I just began spending about five minutes a day on the round, hard-foam roller and, within a week, I was 75% better. Now, good as new. I guess the pressure from the roller forced the gunk out of my muscles, allowing them to actually stretch and loosen. Whatever, I wholly recommend them.

   *If the Mavs don't land Howard what's the big-man Plan B? Cross Al Jefferson and Tiago Splitter off the list. Jefferson will sign with the Charlotte Bobcats, while Splitter re-upped with the San Antonio Spurs. You know what means and you're probably not going to like it: Andrew Bynum. Remember him?

   *Lots of things I don't understand in life. At the top of that list is how wheels on a car rotating really fast forward look like they're somehow spinning backward. And how just one bite of asparagus can transform your pee so incredibly pungent.

   *If you miss me on radio, sorry. For now my words are only here. If you miss Sybil on the radio, you can itch that scratch Monday 1-3 p.m. on her new home, 103.7 KVIL.

   *Ever said "Well, he ain't exactly a Mensa member"? This weekend you can prove it when the American Mensa Society holds its 51st Annual gathering in Fort Worth. If you think you're a smarty pants you can take the exam Saturday morning at The Worthington Hotel.

   *Wondering if this site's traffic would dip after the opening-week debut centering around The Hard Lie 2? Of course it has. But, pleasantly surprisingly, not too much. Last two weeks we've averaged 60,000 pageviews per week, which is enough to keep the lights on. Thank you. Strangest stat? Just this week DFWSportatorium.com has received unique visitors from Germany, Canada, Mexico, Colombia, Dominican Republic, France, United Kingdom, India and Japan. Shout out, wherever this may find you.

   *This weekend? A little tennis Saturday morning, followed by a college graduation party that night. On Sunday let's trek to JoCoMoFo to visit dear ol' mom and dad. A pre-party of sorts, because a certain someone turns 49 on Monday. Don't be a stranger.

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Two Years Too Little Too Late, Rangers Finally Win in St. Louis

   I'll never forget being tearful in the tunnel.
   After a 40-year wait, the climax was within four seconds. In the bowels of St. Louis' Busch Stadium on the chilly night of Oct. 27, 2011, I was among about 100 media members assembled on the perch of history. The Texas Rangers, long the laughingstock of Major League Baseball, led the St. Louis Cardinals in the World Series, three games to two and were now - despite blowing leads of 1-0, 3-2, 4-3 and 7-4 - just one strike away from their first title.
   With a 7-5 lead, two outs in the bottom of the 9th, two strikes on David Freese and All-Star closer Neftali Feliz on the mound, finally, this was it.
   As we watch on a tiny TV in the corner near the 1st-base entrance to the Cardinals' dugout, photographers and cameramen frantically wrap their equipment in plastic and themselves in ponchos to protect from the imminent onslaught of champagne. MLB officials from Major League Baseball hand out information regarding the logistics of the post-game ceremonies. And whisked by on carts are boxes containing Rangers' "World Champions" hats and T-shirts.
   With tears in my eyes and trembling in my hands, I prepare the celebratory Tweet I thought I'd never write:

After 40 years your Texas Rangers are finally champions. As Mark Holtz would've proudly bellowed: "Hello, World Series win column!"

   Since you know the rest of the story - Freese tripled, Rangers lost, and again the next night in Game 7 - you know I never hit send. Only the back-back-back-back button, until the Tweet, and the championship, were painfully erased.

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   A lot has changed since those October bummers two years ago. Josh Hamilton and Michael Young and Mike Napoli are gone and Feliz is now a starter on the shelf with an injury. And then, just to remind us again of what could have been and almost was, the Rangers up and won three straight from the Cardinals over the weekend.

   Call it the most bittersweet sweep in franchise history.
   Nick Tepesch handcuffed the best team in baseball late Sunday night in a 2-1 win, punctuating a series in which Texas held the Cards to a combined seven runs. Nelson Cruz, who of course misplayed Freese's epic triple in '11, hit and Martin Perez pitched and the Rangers ... did absolutely nothing to erase the ghosts of their Adversity Under the Arch.
   The Rangers have fully recovered from their recent six-game losing streak. They took three of four from the Oakland A's and have now won five of six to steady their ship and regain firm footing as one of the best teams in baseball.
   But as much as creating new joy, the weekend sweep in St. Louis simply served as a reminder of the pain that still lingers. And probably always will.

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