WHITT'S END: 12.30.13

   Whether you're at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt's End:

   *Well, I guess there's no need for these anymore ...

   *Jason Garrett will be back in 2014, but with new coordinators. Names on his short list ...

   *Cowboys produced a positive they haven't seen since 1997 with ...

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WHITT'S END: 10.29.13

      Whether you're at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt's End:

   *Apologize? For what exactly? Despite NFL Films releasing this audio of one of Dez Bryant's sideline rants Sunday in Detroit, I still maintain the receiver's demonstrative behavior was unprofessional and unacceptable. And if only me and Jason Witten and DeMarcus Ware and Jason Garrett see it that way, so be it. I'm fine with that. Now, if NFL Films releases the Dez/Witten/Ware exchange from the end of the game and they're simply making positive rah-rah dinner plans, then I'll apologize. (My money says that while Witten was still trying to figure out a way to win the game with :12 remaining, Dez the "passionate competitor" was already pouting and resigned to losing.) And if Dez's demeanor was no biggie, why did his head coach pull him into a private room for a one-on-one chat after the loss to the Lions? Trust me on this, there will be a day when Dez Bryant asks for the ball in a different manner. And on that day he'll be a better receiver, and a better teammate. My latest Dez Dilemma column at NBC 5's Blue Star Blog.

   *The Boston Red Sox are going to win the World Series because of Jon Lester's left arm, David Ortiz's historically hot bat and Koji Uehara's 82-mph splitter that nobody seems to see coming and even fewer have the patience to hit. With the Rangers in the playoffs in '11 and '12, that same Uehara pitched only 2.1 innings and gave up three homers and five earned runs. Now? Unhittable.

   *Feels like Christmas this morning? Nope, not December. It's NBA Opening Day. My favorite sport featuring the world's best athletes. Best team will again be the Heat. Best story will be Derrick Rose's return. Jason Kidd now coaches Paul Pierce in Brooklyn. Dwight Howard is in Houston. Worst team will be the Philadelphia 76ers (their top draft pick Nerlens Noel won't play because of a knee injury). And somewhere in the middle of it all, Dirk Nowitzki, Monta Ellis and the Mavs will return to 50+ wins, the playoffs and ... hit me back come April.

   *As for our little running gun debate, I offered to run the story of a knife mass murder if someone would ever email me a link. Done. And done. Guy in New York apparently stabbed to death a mom and her four kids. Horrible. So, yes, crazy people will find ways to kill regardless of the weapon. That said, I'd rather face the nut job with a knife than the one with a gun.

   *Was watching NFL Network's version of the weekend highlights and Bills-Saints came on. Jimmy Graham caught a bunch of passes including a couple of touchdowns and - I swear - this was analyst Deion Sanders' only, repeated comment: "Better pay dat man!" "Pay. Dat. Man!" "I'm tellin' ya, pay him!" Such insight. And, for what it's worth, no friggin' way Deion, even in his prime time, shuts down Calvin Johnson. Given his size and today's rules, Megatron is like Dad plowing through the 9-year-olds in the back yard. Deion could catch Johnson, but he'd never get him on the ground.

   *Hot.

   *Not.

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   *For the last month Sybil and I couldn't go anywhere without her stopping and squatting. Anywhere. Everywhere. Nope, not a bladder infection. She took this 30-day booty-camp challenge and did something like 3,300 squats in an attempt to become all "Baby Got Back." Ultimately, however, she thinks all the work failed to deliver results. I dunno, I think I see a little more tone in her lovely lady hump.

   *NFL's most annoying gum-chomper: Pete Carroll or John Fox?

   *Other than Designated Hitter, I've come to the conclusion that NFL wide receivers have the easiest job in all of sports. They're receivers in the first place because they generally run faster, jump higher and are more athletic than anyone else on the field. (The players who don't measure up in any of those categories are called cornerbacks.) Accenting those physical advantages are the rules edges. Receivers can only be touched in a 5-yard area, can't ever be held and nowadays can't be violently hit except when they're prepared for it and only then between their numbers. Piece of cake, right?

   *One guy on Twitter was ripping me in the wake of the new Dez Bryant audio, saying "you're in the minority on this one." I guess that's supposed to be a criticism, but I take it as a compliment. See, being in the majority is the easy way out. If I simply wanted to be popular in this area I'd blindly dive on the bandwagon of Conservatives and guns and pickups and anti-gay anything and Nolan Ryan and all things conventional wisdom. Would my radio show have lasted longer? Maybe. But I've scrapped together 27 years over three media platforms in this market by simply being myself. Minority opinion be damned.

   *Once upon a time it was revealed that Dexter Manley "graduated" from Houston Yates High School and attended Oklahoma State for four years without being able to read. Now we learn that Manley needs to go back to school. For sensitivity training. During an interview on Washington's WTOP radio Monday, Manley blurted out "I think Troy Aikman's a queer." You can read worse daily on Twitter or Facebook on any comments section of any blog (ahem), but if you're a public speaker the rules are different. Consider it Manley's first lesson. Hopefully it was learned.

   *Today? We're prepping for this week's Grand Opening at Pizza Buzz, which includes the installation of our lighted permanent sign and a giant menu board over the front counter. Starting to look like a legit restaurant. Don't be a stranger.

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WHITT'S END: 10.28.13

      Whether you're at the end of your coffee, your day, your week or even your rope, welcome to Whitt's End:

   *Dez Bryant's reasoning for being upset during Sunday's loss to the Lions was valid. But the way in which he displayed his frustration and totally lost control of his emotion was inexcusable. It's laughable that Bryant had only six passes thrown his way. He's got a point. But demonstratively yelling at coaches and quarterback Tony Romo is unprofessional and unacceptable. Worst part? Down 1 but about to receive the ball with 12 seconds remaining, the Cowboys were on the sideline attempting to draw up a miracle play. But a pouting, shouting Dez wanted no part of it. When Jason Witten approached to persuade him to join the think tank, Dez barked at him, adamantly flailed his arms and refused. When you have to be disciplined by Witten and DeMarcus Ware (veterans with a combined 20 years of NFL experience) and when you're no longer a solution to your team's problems, then - congratulations - you've officially become a distraction. Production "passion" my ass. His outbursts were a selfish liability on Sunday.

   *You just witnessed the worst defensive month in the history of your Dallas Cowboys. Crazy that I'm pronouncing that just a week after they held the Eagles without a touchdown in Philly, but think about it: In October the Cowboys set dubious franchise records for most points allowed in a home game (51), most yards surrendered in a game (623), most points given up in a 4th quarter (24) and the second-biggest receiving day in NFL history (329). This team has a lot of problems, but the injury-depleted, patch-work defensive line not pressuring quarterbacks is issue No. 1.

   *What a weird, (sorta) wonderful World Series punctuated by two of the craziest endings you'll ever see. I maintain that it's great theater, but bad baseball. In Game 3 Red Sox third baseman Will Middlebrooks inexplicably failed to catch a throw at the bag, then sprawled on the dirt and was called for - of all things - obstruction. First walk-off lay-down in baseball history. Then came last night's peculiar finish. With his team trailing by two and the bat in the hands of Carlos Beltran, pinch-runner Kolten Wong was somehow picked-off 1st base. What happens in Game 5? I predict Nolan Ryan reveals his resignation from Rangers was because he still had an itch to scratch and goes out and throws his 8th career no-hitter for Cardinals.

   *Lions 31, Cowboys 30: My Top 10 Whitty Comments are over at NBC's Blue Star Blog.

   *If you were surprised to hear that Randy Galloway's ultimate replacement on 103.3 FM ESPN is the duo of Matt Mosley/Tim Cowlishaw, then you haven't been reading Whitt's End close enough. Their offering - The Afternoon Show - begins today at 3.

   *Hot.

   *Not.

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   *Okay, I surrender. I'll do anything if T-Mobile will immediately cease and desist with its amazingly annoying "Jeremy" campaign. It's the fat, wrinkled, miserable northeastern couple yammering about their son running up a cell-phone bill, shot in that jerky, stop-motion and looking like its via Skype or something. Yeah, that one. I can't believe some advertising exec actually made money for coming up with that campaign. In the long run, it'll do more harm than good for the company.

   *Crown the Broncos as undisputed champs of the NFC East. Denver went 4-0 against the Cowboys, Giants, Redskins and Eagles, running up 40+ points and 400+ yards in every game while winning by an average of 47-28. Peyton Manning threw 14 touchdowns against the crappy quartet and the Broncos amassing a gaudy 1,849 combined yards.

   *From watching the video, this 7-year-old in Dallas totally ran into the street without looking over the weekend. I don't blame the White Truck for the hit, but there's no excuse for the ensuing run.

   *Love the weather this time of year. I've had the windows in my office open and haven't had A/C nor heat on for three weeks now. Makes us temporarily forget the 100s behind us and the 30s in front of us.

   *America is all about freedom. I can basically write what I want in this blog and go where I want today and believe whatever I want to believe. Most of the time we forget how lucky we are to live in this country instead of, oh, anywhere else. To that end, I respect the rights of the five people I saw standing atop a bridge over 121 in Plano Saturday afternoon holding a sign that read "Honk to Impeach Obama!" But I can't imagine a bigger waste of time. Which article in our Constitution details impeachment via car horn? Besides, one of Obama's legacies at this point is that he introduced legislation attempting to provide affordable health care to every American. Impeachable? Try noble. But, again, feel free to disagree.

   *My fear is that Dez simultaneously improves/deteriorates into Terrell Owens: A player good enough to carry a team; A personality bad enough to rip it apart.

   *Today? Now that Pizza Buzz is up and running there will be days I don't need to be there. Today is not one of those days. See ya in Fort Worth. Don't be a stranger.

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Miles Austin, We've Missed You

   One game into the Cowboys’ season and one thing is abundantly clear: Dez Bryant needs to be mature and Miles Austin needs to be ready.

   As did the New York Giants last weekend, the Kansas City Chiefs this Sunday and the rest of the NFL the remainder of the season, defenses are going to focus their attention on Bryant. The Giants always had a safety lurking and a cornerback in front of Bryant, in what amounted to double-coverage. Bryant held his composure and managed his frustration during a minimally impactful four-catch night.

   “Hey, I got my stats through Witt, through Miles, through Tony and the rest of the other guys,” Bryant said. “The Giants respected me. Everybody across this world knows what I can do. And they know, if the ball is thrown my way, I’m going to get to it. I don’t care if it’s double-coverage, triple or whatever. But we play smart football here. We want to win.”

   The attention to Bryant and future Hall-of-Fame tight end Jason Witten spawns an obvious byproduct: Miles is open.

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   Allowed single-coverage, Austin caught as many first downs as Bryant had total catches, and his 10 grabs were third-most on NFL’s opening weekend behind only Anquan Boldin and Andre Johnson. It was great to see Austin back. It’s imperative that his hamstrings remain healthy and his production stays aloft.

   And not a better place to continue the trend that back where it all started.

   In 2009 Austin was the Cowboys’ third receiver until starter Roy Williams was injured entering Week 5 at Kansas City. So how did Austin respond in his first NFL start on Oct. 11, 2009?

   With a franchise record 250 yards on 10 catches and two touchdowns - most of them against now-Cowboys' corner Brandon Carr - including the 60-yarder in overtime that gave Dallas a 26-20 victory.

   “People bring it up more than I think about it,” Austin said this week at Valley Ranch. “Don’t get me wrong, it was an amazing feeling. I felt like for me personally it was a great way to be able to start and make a splash for the first time offensively. But at the end of the day you realize that my job’s not to talk about what I’ve been doing but to continue to do my best. You kind of snap back into reality on the plane ride home.”
   Austin went on to catch 81 passes for 1,320 yards and 11 scores in making the Pro Bowl. And, it’s been all downhill since.

   Since that breakout game/season, he hasn’t approached 70 catches or caught more than seven touchdowns. His stats and impact yell third receiver, while the six-year, $57 million contract he received in 2010 screams elite No. 1.

   Against the Giants Austin seemed to have his first-step burst back. We know Bryant and Witten will get their catches. If the Cowboys are to exceed expectations, Miles Austin has to return to the days when he got his as well.

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WHITT'S END: 8.9.13

      Whether you're at the end of your rope or merely the end of your week, welcome to Whitt's End

   *Source told me yesterday that while the Mavericks had serious discussions with 105.3 The Fan to become partners, they ultimately are staying put at 103.3 FM. Whether it's ESPN or Tickespn or whatever, for the next two years you can hear Mavs' hoops there. For Chuck Cooperstein fans like myself, that's good news.

   *Putting in a claim to acquire the White Sox' Alex Rios won't save the Rangers' suddenly surging season. He's a .277 hitter with 12 homers. Without Nelson Cruz, the path to the postseason is paved with pitching and defense. Or, by playing the Angels every night. I almost felt sorry for Anaheim as Texas swept it for the second time in 10 days, but then I saw Josh Hamilton's arrogant flailing at first pitches and had to giggle. Considering his second  half in 2012, he's not in a slump. More like a year-long slide below mediocrity.

   *I have a guarantee about tonight's Cowboys-Raiders' preseason game: Jason Witten will have a better night than he did a year ago in Oakland. Remember?

   *I wrote this week that Ticket P1s were "narrow-minded" and I've been asked to expound on that theory. Here goes: Ticket fans are so extremely loyal that they've become blind. Listeners love BaD Radio, but if Bob and Dan would've left for The Fan back in June Ticket fans wouldn't have followed their show. In fact, they would've labeled the hosts "traitors". The quality of show has been replaced - even usurped - by the location on the dial. You can be loyal to McDonald's while recognizing that Wendy's has a delicious Spicy Chicken Sandwich. But some P1s have decided that anything and everyone sold outside 1310 AM is dog shit. Kudos to The Ticket for nurturing such brand loyalty over almost 20 years. But to me, that's narrow-minded.

   *A&M fans are the most sensitive, irrational bunch on the planet. C'mon Aggies, you really, honestly, believe that Johnny Goofball signed hundreds of autographs on memorabilia - assembly-line style - for zero compensation. Just because he's a good guy? Just to help out a bunch of brokers he'd never met before? Riiiiight. When this thing finally plays out we'll be reminded of the perils of hiring 20-year-old kids named "Uncle Nate" to be in charge of anything important. All that said, hopefully this is the impetus to prompt the NCAA to be Dead 'n Gone. Yesterday NCAA Prez Mark Emmert admitted a mistake and yanked all individual jerseys for sale off ShopNCAASports.com. Go away, NCAA. At this point you're part of the problem, not the solution.

   *Hot.

   *Bonus Hot. (Because apparently the link didn't work on some platforms last week.)

   *Not.

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   *If you missed Sybil this morning co-hosting D: The Broadcast, she wore a blue dress. And a huge smile.

   *Public memorial for Kidd Kraddick will be Thursday at 5:30 in Victory Park's AT&T Plaza, featuring a concert by Ben Folds. Still holding my breath at the return of the toxicology reports. Still hope it's not true, but after what I wrote last week about his late-night partying, I received a new slew of folks who heard - even witnessed - the same thing.

    *So Hunter Mahan leaves the Canadian Open golf tournament he's leading to attend the birth of his child and everyone hails him as some kind of hero. Good for him. He's a solo act (other than his caddie). Not letting any teammates down like, say, Colby Lewis did once upon a time.

   *Lotsa folks asking me my take on the Ticket takeover of ESPN. All I got is right here.

   *If I'm Cumulus and I now control 103.3 FM, I immediately buy out the contract of Randy Galloway. As I wrote Thursday morning and as he later confirmed, he'll retire from radio when his deal expires Dec. 31. Why allow him to be a lame-duck host armed with both eff-you attitude and eff-you money? Remember, he's despised The Ticket for years and those boys have used him as a "Grandpa Urine" punch line. That's a dangerous combo. By the way, I love Galloway. Worked with him at the Star-Telegram for years and I'll always remember him taking me and Mike Fisher on a joy ride complete with multiple, illegal, obscenity-laced U-turns in his big Cadillac right in the heart of Times Square. Even then he had an eff-you persona. And by the way, if I'm The Fan, soon as Galloway is bought out by Cumulus I make him a rethink-retirement offer.

   *You know what's dumb? When a snarky web site tries to call Cowboys' fans "dumb" but in the process of its detailed criticism misspells the name of team legend Jay "Novachek." Who looks dumb now?

   *Vintage A-Fraud from his presser this week: "I'm fighting for my life. I have to defend myself. If I don't defend myself no one else will." Okay, cool. Then delight us with the details of how you're not guilty. Go on, defend yourself. Said A-Rod, "This isn't the time or place to do that." What. The. What?!

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   *Creepy story out of South Dallas where Erbie "E Luv" Bowser - a former ManiAAC dancer - killed four and injured four more. Most troubling about the story is the fact that he shot kids aged 11, 13 and 14. Can't imagine ever being that mad - or deranged. Just goes to show you, though, ManiAACs are people, too.

   *When I was in 7th grade American schools actually tried to switch to the Metric system. I remember the "Think Metric!" posters on our classroom walls. It failed. Miserably. So why, 30 years later, do we still sell our American soft drinks in 2-liter bottles? Why aren't they simply 67-ounce bottles?

    *It's a "No Sales Tax Weekend"! To me, that's code for "Another Weekend to Avoid Malls Weekend"! Which, of course, is code for "Just Like Every Other Weekend"!

   *And your latest non-Maverick: Greg Oden. The big man with the bad knees chose the Heat over Dallas. Man I'm tired of writing that storyline.

   *Not a good preseason for those who chose to follow Rob Ryan from the Cowboys to the Saints. Both Victor Butler and Kenyon Coleman have suffered season-ending injuries.

   *Yeah, well at least I didn't build a skyscraper without an elevator.

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   *I've got two new suggestions for you this week: A book by Brian Cuban and a band called the Texas Cotton Kings. The story of Mark Cuban's brother's journey with eating disorders, etc. is compelling stuff. And the Kings will make you feel like you're in down-home Forney, which ain't a bad place to be.

    *LeBron James actually showed up for jury duty this week in Ohio. Gotta give him credit for that. He lives in Bath Township. Can't decide if that sounds exclusive or Rednecky or Amishy.

   *You know it's August in Dallas when you take out the trash at 6 a.m. and return to the house in a shirt drenched in sweat. God Bless Texas.

  *If you want the juice on the real-estate doings of (current and) former Cowboys' quarterbacks like Tony Romo and Troy Aikman, you should be be reading Candy Evans. She knows her scoop.

   *On the list of the toughest things I've done: 1. Climbing a 14,000-foot mountain; 2. Running a marathon; 3. Quitting the Star-Telegram; 4. Skydiving; 5. Bungee jumping; 6. White-water rafting; ... Oh, who am I kidding, dealing with Greggo daily for three years trumps 'em all. Combined.

   *It takes quite the man to prompt current and former employees of ESPN, The Ticket and The Fan to put down their swords long enough to amicably attend a birthday in his honor. And, yes, Bruce Gilbert is that man. The former program director at The Ticket and The Fan, who had a stint in the ESPN family, turns 50 Saturday and representatives from multiple combating radio army outlets will combine to roast him. I'm honored to be invited. Cheers.

   *This weekend? Tonight let's ogle some Cowboys-Raiders. Tomorrow it's a golf tournament in Rockwall with dear ol' Dad, followed by the aforementioned birthday roast. And Sunday we'll finish up the golf tournament in the morning, then play some sand volleyball in Frisco in the afternoon. Don't be a stranger.

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The Top 10 Hardest Things to Hit in Sports

   LeBron James with an alley-oop. Your target weight as a competitive eater. Jason Witten on third-and-four. That desperate groupie with the exposed cleavage and the wanting eyes. The restroom after four beers, ballpark nachos and a chili cheese dog. Singles off Fenway's Green Monster.
   No, those are actually easy to hit.
   Sure you can hit your stride, hit your quota or hit the head, but I'm efforting today to construct a list of the hardest things to hit in sports. Not just around sports, like the gym on the day after a long Thanksgiving filled with food, football and more food; that National Anthem high note on ... o'er the land of the freeeeee! ...; or even a three-team parlay or horse-racing trifecta.
   I'm talking about the hardest thing to hit between the lines. Like ...

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   10. The island 17th green at the TPC Sawgrass Golf Course.

   9. A Hail Mary, when you really need it.

   8. A free throw to tie the game with :01 remaining.

   7. The landing pit after a pole-vault attempt.

   6. John Isner's 151-mph serve.

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   5. An inside-the-park homer.

   4. A fairway wood metal off a downhill lie.

   3. A 7-10 split in bowling.

   2. Most of Yu Davish's unidentified flying objects, better known as pitches.

   1. Floyd Mayweather's bobbing, weaving, cat-quick - unhittable - target.

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